FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize