Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
