you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
