i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
