I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
