Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
