Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize