bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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