Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
