Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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