i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
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