"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
