He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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