some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
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