Where is the hickey?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize
