I will die if light touches me.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
You're earring is so big in my mouth
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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