I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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