what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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