I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
