The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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