He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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