I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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