We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize