My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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