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• (606): View more from Kentucky

  the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years

  Fav 6 942 2772

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (567): View more from Ohio

  i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255

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• (716): View more from New York

  my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.

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• (407): View more from Florida

  I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.

  (904): View more from Florida

  Yeah he's good at that.

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.

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• (207): View more from Maine

  he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  IT'S SUMMA TIME

  (907): View more from Alaska

  ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  THEY'RE THE SAME THING

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• (214): View more from Texas

  You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.

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• (863): View more from Florida

  She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.

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