In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.