He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
