I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
We need to rekindle our bromance
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Semen is not good for contacts.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
