I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
