road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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