Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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