I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
