I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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