There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize