good thing vaginas are great cup holders
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
