How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
it glows. i had to have it.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I just gargled with NyQuil
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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