girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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