I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Randomize
