the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
