kristin has been a bad kristin
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
