You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
