I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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