a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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