Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Please don't give away my fajitas
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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