no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize