you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
