I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
