Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize