So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Randomize
