i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize