I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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